Lessons from a Live Poker Tourney
published on 09/09/09 at 4:17 pm
Today I played a $25 buy in, turbo tournament with a starting stack of 4k chips with 10 minute levels. Basically it means you have to catch cards and flops because it is hard to make a move with so few chips.
Well, the day started out good as I held ATs in the button, action folded to me so I popped a raise to 250. Blinds were at 50/100. SB folds and BB calls. Flop comes J59, rainbow. BB checks. I fire out 500, he calls. No worries, I’ll get him on the turn. The turn comes Qx, BB checks, I continue with a 500 bet. I hope he folds, f*** no, he raises to 1K. Oh shit. He must have a Q. Again, f*** him, I call. River comes 8. HAHAHAHAHA, I caught a straight. BB puts in ½ his remaining stack. I move all in. He flips over JJ for a set, I turn over my T and show him the straight. The lesson here: Every donkey has his day when a bluff turns good. Oh well. Life goes on. And f*** JJJ.
IBGPN
After a few more bust outs, our table breaks and I get moved to Table 4, Seat 4. To my right is a dude that reminds me of IBGPN, because he is wearing an Arkansas shirt, with a stain on it that I can only assume comes from a pig’s ass, as he straddled that live bacon to get some. Not sure how they let this guy into the casino. Security is lacking. Oh well, what can you do? I just hope he took a shower in this century, but it might be wishful thinking.
ChrisHiter
And the guy on my left looks exactly like the twitter douche known as ChrisHiter. This knucklehead is wearing a shirt that says “I’m with Stupid” and has an arrow pointing up. What a table. Stupid shirt guy drooled a bit on himself and the cards. New deck please.
Both these guys are short stacked, so they’ll be out soon. In fact, in the next hand, Mr. Inbred Jed of Arkansas goes out when this 89s was no match for KK with a K on the board. What was this cousin f***er thinking? Who knows and who cares. Oh well, he’s off to f***his aunt mom. No worries.
Next to leave the table was our very own stupid shirt guy. This guy actually tried to bluff 73o after a raise and a re-raise in front of him. Both he and the original raiser flat call. Flop comes out Ah6h6c. Reraiser moves all in, and after much thought and drool, our friend ChrisHiter calls his remaining chips. Other guy folds. Reraiser flips AcQh and wins. The lessons here: If you like to f*** cousins and your aunt mom, you suck at poker. And if you drool on your cards while wearing a shirt that proclaims you are stupid, by all means take a seat next to me.
I would eventually get to 3rd in chips and as the final four, we agreed to chop. I walked away with a bit more than $150. Not bad for two hours work. I guess the final lesson here is this: No matter how bad I suck at poker, I can still walk away with money at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Tulsa.
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